Doc Hollywood

I own a god-awful amount of dvds. Once, at a party here at the house, a woman asked me why. I have to admit I was a bit flummoxed by the question. I'm sure I stammered something about liking to watch movies over and over, and that's a large part of it. I also know that I enjoy loaning movies out to friends and neighbors alike. I'm like the library or netflix, without pesky monetary fees of some sort. Regardless, it's clear that there are a slew of films that I either don't need to own, or don't even know if I need to own. Time to do a little weeding.

With that in mind, I've decided to watch the films in my collection that are ripe for discarding. There are three types of dvds in my collection that fit the bill: 1. A film that I heard was good, yet have never seen. 2. A film I've seen once and liked. 3. Schmaltzy crap that I've somehow acquired. Seeing as how my attention span is limited, I've decided to give these marginal dvds 30 minutes of my time. When those thirty minutes are up, I will decide, Solomon like, whether or not to ditch the dvd. First up, Doc Hollywood.

WHY IT'S HERE

As embarrassing as it is to admit that I have this movie in my collection, I'm at a loss for explanations. All I can say is that I have, and will always have, a deep inexplicable love for Michael J Fox.

WHAT IT'S ABOUT

I guess if you've seen the movie Cars, you've seen Doc Hollywood. It's your basic fish-out-of-water movie. I'll leave it to the Evansville Courier Press to get you up to speed (no pun intended):

The makers of "Doc Hollywood" called. They want their movie back.

"Cars" rolls along like an animated, automotive version of that 1991 Michael J. Fox gem, from its basic plot points to its feel-good conclusion.

Stop us if you think you've heard this one before: A young hotshot on his way to Los Angeles causes a crash and gets stuck in a small town. Before he can leave, he must spend several days doing community service, only to find out that he likes the simple life there and that he's learned more about family and friendship than he'd ever imagined.

Y'now it!

WHO'S IN IT

The aforementioned midget. Major Charles Winchester III. The love interest from Tommy Boy. The old coot from The Lost Boys.

WHAT YOU GET

A lot of Southern accents. Cows in the middle of the road. The cranky old Black nurse. The cranky old White doctor. A gaggle of old loveable biddies. Yokels that can't read or figure out that the spot in their vision is actually a smudge on their glasses. The smart-mouthed, tough, single-mom/ambulance driver "Lou."

HIGHLIGHTS

The odd John Waters-esque member of the City Council. Ellen & The Pakistani. Julie Warner's achingly gratuitous topless scene (first as a prophetic dream sequence and then in "real life" not thirty seconds later), and the old coot verbally dressing down Senor Fox and finishing it off by making it known in no uncertain terms that even with his citified ways, Fox probably couldn't tell the difference between "crap and crisco."

VERDICT

Discard. But, only just.