I've had a secret romance going on for some time now. Only a select few were informed. Perhaps fantasy is a better word. I'm not certain. But this past Saturday night I had my first taste. My first initiation into Roller Derby.
The Maine Roller Derby girls kicked some serious ass against the Pioneer Valley Roller Derby from Massachusetts and Jenabeat and I had front row seats. I didn't even know the rules until the bout started. Each bout is comprised of three 20-minute periods which are further broken down into jams which can last two-minutes or less. In a nut shell, each team has four Blockers and one Jammer. She's the girl who must come from behind and work her way through the rest of the girls, the blockers, to get to the front of the pack. If she makes it to the front first she scores a point. Make sense? It ain't easy. The blockers do just that - block.
But this is not some Raquel Welch exploitation flick from the 70s. We're not talking big tits and pulling hair. No one is intentionally hurting another girl for the pleasure of men. But they do have cool outfits and kick-ass names, thank goodness! (some of my favorite names from this bout: Miss Creant, Hot Hips Houlihan, Graceless Kelly, The Mom Bomb, and Hurt Vonnegut). They do wipe out and they do elbow each other around a lot. The best part -- these women are of all shapes and sizes and ages. They are serious but they are having fun. It was tremendously empowering to watch.
I met a bunch of the derby girls at a private party held at my bar months ago. And maybe I poured a wicked shot 'cause several of them implored me to join. Me!?
That little bug made a nest in my ear. I've been thinking about it. I saw a bout and now I'm really thinking about it. Am I insane?
6 comments:
You should get your skates on...
What would be your alias?
There's nothing like a derby girl. My favorite Duke City Derby names are Mortal Wombat, R2-Beat-U, & Muffin.
The name is the thing. I don't have a clue yet. And I have thought about it.
There was a girl at the derby party called Jacked Rabbit. That was a good one. I didn't see her at the bout though.
Suggestions?
I think you should see about joining and then the name will become obvious.
Auntie Maim
Strawberry Hurt-Cake
Lady Shatterlly
The Eradicator
Fuckin' A go for it. There's no reason not to. Although, I have to say that I don't even remotely get where the "hurt other women for the pleasure of men" thing comes from. Roller Derby when I was growing up was as real as wrestling, and totally kick ass. F-U-N, fun. With no patriarchal blah-blah-blah blah blah.
I was referring to "Kansas City Bomber" the 1972 Raquel Welch film. Tagline: The Hottest Thing on Wheels. Just an exploitation film depicting the sport. The men in the audience ate up the girl on girl sexualized violence. My first experience with roller derby. I thought that was part of the deal. Wrong.
I like your suggestions for names, by the way.
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