I admit that I thought highly of Buffalo 66. And then he made Brown Bunny. Well ... apparently he really needed a blow-job. That was real!!! All me! Just ask Chloe Sevigny. His recent rant defending the size and authenticity of his manhood has been all over the web. Like him or not. Vincent Gallo's tour de force is his website: http://www.vincentgallo.com/home.html Better than ice cream sandwiches -- The official website of Vincent Gallo by Vincent Gallo.
Christmas is coming and some of your hard-to-buy-for friends might be satisfied with his original art work, clothing designs (including super cute tube-tops and mini-skirts in size small with his appliqués and signature attached -- "Property of Vincent Gallo"). He's also selling t-shirts, posters, cds, dates and sperm. Wait a minute, now. Dates and sperm?
If you've got the money honey, he's apparently got the time. Ladies only, lesbos welcome. For the modest fee of $50,000 plus expenses Vincent will fulfill the wish, dream, or fantasy of any naturally born female. Heavy set, older, red heads and even black chicks can have him if they can pay the bill. A full weekend: $100,000. And he's willing to donate as much sperm as it takes to get the job done. Again, if you've got the money.
Wow. Vincent takes the cake (so to speak). Actor, director, artist, musician, prostitute. For any of the above personal services a full scanning for STDs is required. As is proof of bathing and grooming. A detailed photo is required prior to any encounter. Seems reasonable.
At first I laughed at his brazen egotism. But, maybe he really does need the money. And do I really need the Homicide box set on my Xmas list? Or would something else really do the trick? How much is a bikini wax?
6 comments:
I'm speechless.
Ewwwwww.
Yeah, you and every other hollywood-hater loved the completely innocuous/waste-of-time Buffalo 66 but Gallo always was and always will be a vain, marginally talented (and this is being overly kind) artist. Now you can pay cash to hang out with the Cock and his cock. Whatevah.
Of course you'd be infinitely more satisfied with the Homicide box set, and even more so if you moved on to its even more polished and superior progeny The Wire.
Such a wisecracker. Surely you realize I was mocking Mr. Gallo and am not interested in his cock or his work. But I might enjoy The Wire if someone sent me dvds of the series for Xmas. Perhaps you'd like the Vincent Gallo fringe jacket he wore in Brown Bunny?
It was an universal "you", not a wednesday "you". On the cock tip, at least. Cuz you're totally a hollywood-hater.
I could see about the Wire action for xmas. You know the crip delivers.
BTW, I don't wear the skins of dead animals. Just dead plants.
I prefer the royal "we". As in, we do not hate Hollywood but we have been disappointed so often in the past that we have lost our faith. We don't like happy endings tied up in bows because we don't like to be told lies as entertainment. We think we can do better.
But I will check to see if the website For Vincent Gallo By Vincent Gallo lists any hemp slacks.
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